Brandon Flowers – Crossfire

  • 12 Jul 10

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Oh dear! It would appear Brandon Flowers (that guy from The Killers) is strapped to a chair in some kind of warehouse. How curious, maybe he should sing for a little while to lift his spirits. So he’s barely into the chorus when a Ninja with its arm on fire comes flying past him into a collection of conveniently placed boxes. Who could pull of such a daring rescue mission? Looks like it’s Charlize Theron, that totally makes sense. Anyway so this other Ninja comes flying inĀ  behind her and she’s all KA-POW and fucks him up with a sword she didn’t have a moment ago. and then Brandon pulls this face to show he likes it.

So then somehow Brandon manages to get caught AGAIN and strapped to two single beds that have been stripped of their mattresses and placed against a wall, which is a legitimate form of torture if you ask me. How on earth will he get good support without a quality mattress? Tsk Tsk. To make matters worse those Ninjas are throwing some water over the poor chap. Naturally this will not do so some lame pyrotechnics action happens and Charl (she lets me call her that) sticks her head down from a elevator shaft and two Ninjas with throwing stars and then she kills ANOTHER Ninja who decides to run up behind her (clearly unaware of the fate his similarly dressed friend received when he tried the same manoeuvre). To show his gratitude he decides to treat her to yet another smile, after all, she has worked for it.

So now Charlize is in a car, she decided to run over a few Ninjas (they’re just knocking about, really) and then proceeds to get into a bout of fisticuffs with these hooded ruffians. Then she walks up some stairs and reveals a sword which would have been useful in the fight she just ha- OH WAIT THERE’S ANOTHER NINJA. She fights him off and then pushes him throw a window, he seems defeated. Brandon is hanging upside down from the ceiling in some sort of bizzare masturbation act. He pulls a little face of shame.

So then they get in a car and Charlize looks at him as if to say “Son, I am disappoint”.

THE END.

Alec