22 May 11
Oh Mozza, another year older, another year you resemble Robin Williams a little bit more, and another notch closer to I get to a restraining order. I hope YOU’VE GOT EVERYTHING NOW, seeing as its your 52nd and all. Surely you woke this morning to a stack of birthday presents and thought to yourself PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE LET ME GET WHAT I WANT, and I sincerely hope you did get that Nintendo DS with Pokemon Black. Maybe somebody’s put some joke candles in your cake, meaning THERE IS A LIGHT THAT NEVER GOES OUT? But seriously WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE? If your parties a bust, you could probably spice things up by scoring an INTERESTING DRUG, or failing that some GLAMOROUS GLUE, and…uh now I’m beginning to PANIC, because I STARTED SOMETHING I COULDN’T FINISH, and THIS JOKE ISN’T FUNNY ANYMORE.
Please don’t read this Morrissey. Or anyone for that matter. Happy Birthday Mozza.